11.23.2012

#243 -- Blood Shack (1971)

Rating: 1 / 5
Director: Ray Dennis Steckler

Take a look at the cover of this movie. Looks pretty cool, huh? Don't be fooled, though, because the cover is very misleading. It makes it look like there's going to be some kind of crazed psychopath, or inmate or something, but there isn't. No, nothing so cool as that. There's actually absolutely nothing good about this movie. Well, aside from the fact that it's running time is less than an hour, so we don't have to sit through it for too long.

Synopsis from IMDB: A young woman inherits a ranch that is supposedly haunted by murderous beast called "The Chooper."

I have no idea what a "chooper" is exactly, but I imagine it's a horrible killer that fails to elicit any fear whatsoever. The movie started out with a group of three friends who wanted to visit the so-called blood shack. The girl of the group wanted to spend the night to prove that the Chooper didn't exist, but the guys were too chicken shit, so they left her there. She was killed, after being warned by the caretaker, Daniel, who didn't know the meaning of a shirt. Daniel was annoying, to say the least. His sole purpose was to warn people to stay out of the house, and of course, to be shirtless. Sometimes he wore a jacket; but never a shirt. It wasn't just people who went into the house that got killed, either. They could just be walking in front of it, and a killer would jump out of nowhere and scream while pretending to stab them with some kind of pointed object. The effects were horrible, but I can't really blame it for that. It was  made in the 70s with a minuscule budget. That's not the problem I have with the movie. The problem is that it's boring as hell. All the kills are exactly the same, the characters are boring and/or annoying, and the main female character did a completely unnecessary narration that really got on my nerves.

Now you know everything you need to know about Blood Shack!
It doesn't help that at least twenty minutes of the movie are spent watching a fucking rodeo. Who wants to watch a rodeo; I mean, honestly? The ending was 100% expected, and it was some serious Scooby Doo shit. "I was just trying to scare you off because I want to buy your ranch," type of thing. Oh, but Daniel was sure to tell our main lady--"Still, if you go in the house, the Chooper'll getcha!" So, I'm not really sure if there was a Chooper at all.

I will say there were a couple of good actors in here, but they were two little girls. The rest were horrible and annoying. The movie has nothing going for it except, like I said, that it doesn't last too long.

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