10.05.2012

#196 -- Zombie Night (2003)

Rating: 2 / 5
Director: David J. Francis

If there's one thing you need to know about zombie movies, it's this: there are a hell of a lot of them. And since there are so freaking many, it's natural that there are a few (okay, a whole bunch) of bad ones in the lot. It's actually kind of hard to find good ones once you've seen a couple. This is one of those bad ones. It's a low-budget affair, but that's not why it's bad. The effects actually weren't that bad; it was the story and acting that ruined this movie.

Of course, zombies are plaguing the world. The synopsis on IMDB said something about a nuclear fallout between Pakistan and some other middle eastern country, but I don't remember that being mentioned in the movie. That doesn't mean it wasn't; it just means that I didn't feel the need to pay enough attention to find out. It started off a man, his  new girlfriend, and his daughter. They were apparently on their way back from vacation, when their car died and they heard on the radio that there were zombies afoot. Surprised and scared, they made their way to an abandoned building. They were safe there for a while, and they met up with another guy who'd lost his family. They teamed up with a shitload of other people, holed up in some building, and tried to survive together. They had food, water and other supplies to last them a while. What they didn't have was anything at all to keep me interested in them. The only interesting character in the whole movie was only interesting because he was a complete asshole. It just kept me wondering what he was going to do next to piss everyone else off.

The characters weren't good, as you can tell. They didn't have any real personalities, and nothing going on for them to make me sympathize. They'd all lost family members, but that's nothing. In the zombie apocalypse, anyone can say they've lost loved ones; it doesn't make them interesting. And the acting was so bland and terrible that it was impossible to like any of them anyways.

The only thing it had going for it were the effects. They weren't perfect, they weren't amazing by a long shot; but they were better than I'd expected them to be. And that was the only redeemable quality this had. I've got to give them something, right? It was a boring movie that made nothing of itself. I'm not surprised that the only picture I could find from it was a chick with her boobs out. I take it back about the effects; the boobs were the best part of the movie. They were pretty nice. So, if you're looking to see a nice set of boobs, watch some porn. Because even the tittie shots don't make this movie worth watching. Oh, I couldn't find a trailer either; so don't expect it to be in The Trailer Park. Not that you were interested in the first place...

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